The Desert
June 5, 2007: 12:25 AM

(Blog Soundtrack: Bob Dylan - Meet Me in the Morning. Open it in a new tab/window and read along)



Arrived back in town from Phoenix this (yesterday, now? fuck, it got to be 3am pretty quick) morning. Here's what I learned at the airport:

1. I need a laptop with longer-lasting batteries
2. With the democrats' debate on CNN being broadcast throughout the terminal at the airport, and the flights in my general area being to Dallas, Denver, Birmingham, and my destination of Detroit, I didn't even have to read the gates to find out where my plane would be boarding - just follow whichever pile of onlookers were nodding more.
3. Peanuts are free in very small doses if you can wait until you get in the air. Otherwise, they're like eight fucking dollars.




Phoenix is nice, man. All sorts of hot, and this isn't at all the worst of it. And thought it was hot in Windsor at 84 degrees. Small mountain ranges surround the city valley, and it makes for really nice views.

Three things I learned after landing:

1. Dockers are summer-wear in Canada, but not in Arizona.
2. Lawns are at a premium, and I should water mine religiously when I get back. Just in case.
3. I really ought to get a high-def television, even though I really don't watch much TV. The one in the hotel room was the king shit of television sets. I would watch the shopping channel if it were that crisp all the time, man. Still not golf-on-tv, though.




Rented a car, a nice new Sebring. Had a great time driving it, too. Air conditioning is a must - my '99 Intrepid would never make it. Had some time to kill on Sunday, saw a mountain range and drove to it.

It was a good call.




Ate a sandwich on a rock out in the middle of nowhere. Communed with nature. Hung out with Jim Morrison and a naked indian. The usual.



Three things I learned out in the middle of nowhere:

1. I'm not too good for cactus-shade.
2. The wind feels like a blow-dryer
3. It's been a real long time since I've seen Wayne's World 2.



I haven't got a bad thing to say about Phoenix, really. I had a great time. The hot weather was a nice change of pace, except I feel cold all the time ever since I've been back.

Of course, I've had nothing bad to say about any of the cities I've visited recently.

Of course, this is all coming from the guy who waves his hands in front of himself when walking up to automatic sliding doors, just because it feels like there's some bit of control.

(Even when nobody's looking. Especially when nobody's looking)



Felt sick the whole plane ride back home. Luckily it was way underbooked and I had a whole row of seats to myself. I laid down across the row and turned a worn polo shirt into a makeshift pillow and drifted off for an hour or two, before we hit some bad weather somewhere over - shit, I don't know. Utah, maybe.

After that, crossed the bridge into Canada, and slept for half a day. Dreamed I was being chased down by the guys from Penny Arcade. Woke up in a cold sweat.



Thanks for the comments: David Airey, Meg, Snow, Nina, Andrew, Helen, Manju, Colin, Crissa, Stef, Kahuki.

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